ergnss

ive run into an idea repeatedly in the last few weeks, that i am just not worth it to people. Not worth explaining things to, not worth loving, not worth talking to, and any other sort of things. I am just not wrth the effort. Im not sure how i figured this out but i know its mostly true, yea i have the whole my family loves me thing and in alot of cases i guess that more then other people, but this new sense of worthlessness isnt very good for me. Im al perk and smiles at school and work then im miserable at home. I know that most people are faking things and doing that for work, where i have to be happy and energetic if i am or not has afectively broken some inner working i have leaving me drained afterwards. I want to be worth something to people not just be a bumb in their road, a notch in thier belt, however you want to put it. I guess today was just a long really bad day and i will read this a month from now or a year and laugh at how stupid and melodramatic im acting but right now i really do just feel this way and ahve no clue how to stop it.